You've Excelled at Being
Everything to Everyone Else
Now You're Ready to Treat YourselfÂ
Like You Matter, Too
Because You Do.
It's time to be kind to yourself.
Instead of spending your whole weekend ruminating over how you worded that Friday text to your boss or beating yourself up for forgetting your neighbor’s birthday amidst the 5,671 other things you’re balancing,
You’re ready to hold yourself in high regard.Â
You’re ready to feel in your bones that you deserve grace - and to give it to yourself - not because of how pleasing you are or how much you achieve, but because you have a deep and abiding sense that you are enough.Â
It’s time to be proud of you.Â
Capitalist culture (propped up by white supremacy and patriarchy) undermines our self-esteem by teaching us we aren’t doing enough – that we aren’t enough – so we learn to push and strive.
We ignore our limits and don’t take the Sick Day because we don’t want to let them down.
We say yes at 4:57pm to answer that “one-quick-question”, and tell ourselves for the umpteenth time we can just make the 5:30 yoga class some other day. Â
We are trained to believe we can and should be doing more.
And it’s exhausting.
It’s exhausting belaboring every interaction.
It’s exhausting being our own PR firm, making sure no one misunderstands us as selfish, rude, burdensome, or ungrateful.
It’s exhausting overriding our inner compass, which has been gently urging us to define (and accept) what is enough.
And after several decades of contorting to make sure everyone else is okay, we may feel lost or overwhelmed by trying to figure out what we even want.
AND…
This doesn’t make us bad.
These patterns have worked on our behalf in many regards - earning us praise, affection, admiration, and gratitude.
Seeming to have it all together generates lots of shiny praise.
But if you find yourself running on the fumes of adrenaline or subsisting on the crumbs of other people’s approval…
Are these patterns still serving you?Â
What if... Things Could be Different?
Who Do You Get to Be
When Your Energy Isn’t Overly Preoccupied
with Other People’s Perceptions of You?
Oh, but where to even start?
It’s hard to imagine beyond the echo chamber of your own thoughts, fears, and self-critiques. And what if you mess it up? Or worse, what if you try something, and it doesn’t work? How embarrassing <clutches sheet of gold stars> to admit you haven’t figured this out yet.
Most importantly, what if people judge you for breaking from your familiar, dependable ways?
*Big exhale*
I know.
I know how reassuring the discomfort of the familiar can be - and how worrisome the thought of rocking the boat might feel.Â
That’s one of the advantages of having a coach on your journey with you - your steadying anchor as you tune your inner compass, experiment with gradual, sustainable change, and grow your courage to honor your needs instead of leaving them unattended on that crusty, old back-burner.Â
This is the work we do in my high-touch 1:1 coaching and group programs, so you can stop walking on eggshells, being overly responsible for everyone else’s feelings, and start honoring your own.
It’s time to finally feel balanced, empowered, and secure — without the guilt.
Hi! I'm Allison (she/her)
Since leaving my societally virtuous career as an educator to become a self-trust coach, I’ve gotten a lot of practice with bucking the internalized pressure to be everything to everyone else.
Now I coach other over-doers and over-givers who are over it — over being overly accommodating, overwhelmed, and over-extended.
Using my Enoughness Method, I’ve coached dozens of people to stop over-riding their limits and start honoring their needs— without getting trapped doom-spiraling over how everyone else sees them.
It’s time to learn to trust yourself.
More about Me
Molly M.
"Historically, I have spent so much time in my head with my racing thoughts that it has been hard for me to slow down and connect to my body.Â
My internal voice is now at the center of my decision-making and I am able to stop myself from spiraling in old mental stories. I trust my reactions and decisions more because I have the tools to be in my body, slow down, and ground myself.
Allison meets people where they are at and equips you with tools that are a right fit for you. She creates a nurturing environment and asks just the right questions for me to access my own wisdom and come to my own revelations. I felt vulnerable to say things to myself that I would have been scared to say otherwise."
Danielle W.Â
"Working with Allison is one of the first times in my life I truly felt my needs were centered.Â
I came to her because I struggled to communicate my needs and prioritize time for myself, which left me feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, undervalued, and resentful. I really wanted to make choices that were authentic to me with less guilt and less worry about how other people would perceive me.
Each session, the tools Allison used help me get to the bottom of and shed old thinking. I trust myself and now believe access to my kindness and generosity needs to be earned and reciprocated. I am carving out more time for myself and I’m putting up with a lot less shit!"
Mallorie W.
“Prior to working with Allison, I was feeling indecisive around an important career decision. Working with Allison helped me turn a corner. I made a decision that brought me peace and hope. A weight was lifted. I was able to gain the insights I’d hoped for all along. Â
Allison was warm, understanding, and met me on equal ground. I felt safe in her presence. Working with Allison led to some big shifts in my thinking. When the call ended, I was in a completely different place from where I began. That is a testament to Allison’s skill, grace and power.”
Subscribe to My Tending Trust NewsletterÂ
Receive a biweekly(ish) dose of clarity and courage, so you can:
- Stop compulsively over-doing, andÂ
- ACTUALLY take good care of yourself -- without the guilt.
You will also receive early announcements about upcoming programs to build a more secure, satisfying, and sustainable relationship with yourself.
